Reconsideration.

I started this to be more truthful with something or someone. Am I doing it?
Fuck.
All the fancy words make it nice to read. I'm just putting some mascara on the truth. Whatever fucking truth is out there. Or in there. My head. My goddamn head.
Just speak whatever's in there. It won't hurt the internet's feelings...
I'm doing it wrong. It's good I know. It's nice to read. It's deep. It's solemn, but the unquestionable and undeniable truth. Wait is it?
You dickhead.

I'm too afraid I won't live up to myself. I am myself. I'll live up to whatever is alive. Whatever gives the experience of living some meaning.
What the hell am I supposed to live up to?
Not what makes me happy. The world teaches you that.
So what is it?
I'm not writing it down.

Not here. Not yet.

Now it's time for raw words. Whatever's there. Fancy words make up the dressing. That comes later.
If I make this blog into a journal. I will not fucking put this in. No. There's all the real articles I wrote for that. Fuck it.

I'll be better.
I sincerely hope that for changing your ways, 26th time is the charm.